Mother never raised a Harlot; Fate did.

Reputations-
When we're young our parents tell us not to care or worry about what the other kids think.
In truth, it's shit advice...

Cause upon growing up, the story changes.
Your reputation is suddenly all you have.
It's all you can control.
In short; Opinions matter.
They always have.

I try not to think about it too much. Doing that can get you down.
Maybe one day, people will realise there's more to someone than face value.

(Maybe not?)

The world is superficial after all.
Ah well, a girl can hope can't she???


A mere thought...ishax

Madness... Madness! .. MADNESS!?!!?!?!?!!?... (On a side note: Let's get hitched???)

Today I decided was the opportune day for an Op shopping spree!!! So together with the family I ventured across Perth on the look-out for some good places to 'cash-in'. Ultimately after suffering through several horrible remixes of 'American Pie' and finally being relieved by Tim & Jean's 'Come Around' we wound up somewhere in the Joondalup area, at what was possibly the largest and most well organised Salvos I've ever been to!!
Now, on the scale of Op-shops I have to admit, Slavos are PRICEY! (Good Sammy's are always much more flexible when it comes to pricing) However, in this case, the sheer multitude of variety and organisation at this place is well worth the extra dollar, come sale time.

So after a fair amount of browsing, and with the up and coming 'formal dinner' I will be attending tomorrow night in mind, I was on the hunt for some simple cocktail dresses that would be perfect to jazz up with ribbons, beads, scarves or whatever else that makes its way into my fiddly little fingers. Here are just 3 simple designs that when combines with accessories can act as complete and utter showstoppers!

(Plain and baby blue lace, works really well with that idea of 'Winter Wonderland'; our dinners theme. Although I do think something like this would look amazing in both white or grey, especially as I usually see baby blue working well on girls with light coloured hair or eyes.)

(The signature LBD or Little Black Dress is indeed a must have. I love the detail on the breast of the dress and the way the dress flows out at the waist to create a soft umbrella umbrella skirt base. The best thing about black however is it always looks good - slimming effects also being a plus. You can dress it up or dress it down depending oh where you wanna go and how much attention you're hoping to attract- In my case; I go for gold!)

(Okay, before I mentioned the 'Winter Wonderland-esqu-ness' of the first dress however this one takes it to a whole new level! Although the dresses colour is more suited to something I'd consider as 'ocean bound' I still love the beading which kind of reminded me of snowflakes. The true 'ga-ga' factor of this dress however, had to have been the way it sat on the body; pretty much hiding any and every lump and bump from the boobs down... Sadly, due to my severe lack of 'breast-es-ess' the dress didn't completely knock my socks off as I spent far too much time worrying that it may fall down to reveal my goodies before the formal dinners celebrations had fully begun. But, if unlike myself, you happen to be blessed with the gift of 'boob-age', then this dress is perfect for you!! It shows off your best assets (the girls) and at the same time hides everything else!- Seriously, How could you not be happy with something like that???)

Anyway just before I finish up (as I believe I've ranted far too much already), Let me just say that although at this point in my life I can't ever see myself tying the knot... OP SHOP WEDDING DRESSES MAKE ME WANNA GET HITCHED!!!!

Anytime I see them I revert back to my childhood... and a voice in my head immediately squeels: "DRESSUPTIME!!!!" Although a wedding dress is not the most practical of things, if I didn't look like and absolute douche-bag, I would probably choose to wear one everyday!!

Yeap, I did it.I forced my sister to try one on.

(((MARRY ME???)))

Someone propose to me already so I can buy one!!! Pleassseeeeee!!!...ishax

Air Wick Sensors = Satan???

Unsure if anyone else has had the same experience but those new AirWick sensors HAVE to be the creation of the Devil. Not in a preachy Mormon kinda way, but seriously, if you've ever tried to go to the bathroom during the early hours of the morning, in the pitch-black cover of night to have it scare the life out of you, almost to the point of wetting yourself just short of making it to the toilet, then you'll know what I mean.

(Looks like a plastic tampon)

What's suppose to happen according to the ad...
(Puts on a nice posh English voice)

The motion triggers the AirWick spray and delivers a "puff of freshness" to your home.

What happens in reality....

I get up to go to the bathroom at 2 am in a drowsy, half-comatose state, sit down I hear a noise that sends my heart rate soaring, almost as if at any moment, my heart could burst open from my chest and rival Usain Bolt in a 100 meter sprint.

In other news, seriously, what I have below is a MUST SEE VID!!!! Before you go on I highly recommend you watch it all the way through :D

So um yeah... WTF....
(I still want these glasses though!!!!)

So... after watching that are you shitting yourself???
Yeah. thought as much. Well that's how the stupid Air Wick 'DEVIL TAMPON' makes me feel! I don't mind having the bathroom or the house smelling nice, but seriously... If it causes me to have a heart attack then I'm not so sure. I mean, inventors..."WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!!??!". If they can make silencers for guns why can't someone create on for my air freshener!?!?!
So, in closing... If you are willing to have a nice smelling house (at any cost), or are interested in killing a large number of old people with fragile heart conditions; then this is deffinitely the product for you!!

"Devil Tampon"- Heh!...ishax

FOX-CULT?

To all my followers,
a special message on this grand winter day...

May the FOX be with you.

(I can't tell whether she's really meant to be a Jedi knight(?) or Religious Figure(?). Maybe I should've spent more of my childhood watching more Starwars???... mmm Yeah, No.)

Hey there Wookie! Have a Cookie... ishax

Getting all teary over here.

When I was younger, my mum and dad would always play a lot of Reggae music; the earliest memories of my childhood being those where my mum would throw on some Bob Marley, and dad would push me on a swing he made out of an old car seat, while singing 'Jammin' (completely off key).
It was was back then that I always noticed a sheet of paper on the fridge next to dad's enormous collection of fridge magnets which he would buy on the occasional trip to the video rental store, but that never really served any purpose other than being ornamental playthings for my sister and I. That sheet was always there, a sheet no bigger than a CD cover, covered in small black writing, with a picture of a faded sunset beneath the words. From the moment I was able to read and spell out letters, I read that sheet over and over. Sometimes, when the fridge would get cluttered with bills or school notices, I'd dig that one sheet up and bring back to where it was visible. I remember what it said. After years of those words being burnt into my memory, now, I don't even have to think twice.

"You may not be her first, her last, or her only.

She loved before she may love again.

But if she loves you now, what else matters?

She's not perfect - you aren't either, and the two of you may never be perfect together

but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes,

hold onto her and give her the most you can.

She may not be thinking about you every second of the day,

but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart.

So don't hurt her, don't change her, don't analyze and don't expect more than she can give.

Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she's not there."

-Bob Marley

Back then, I never understood what the writing on that torn up, old sheet of paper really meant. I mean, I knew it had something to do with love or at least relationships, but I never realised the honesty and validity of Bob Marleys words. It's only been recently, having grown a bit in my own way, that I'm starting to appreciate this quote. It has become one of my favourites, although to be honest, I think it always has been.

It's been almost eight years since that sheet of paper was thrown away, but today, when, out of sheer luck, while browsing through my old school books I came across it; Written in the back of my year 4 English Journal- missing all forms of punctuation, and with words like 'secound' spelt wrong, it was still there...and it made me teary.

So I just wanted to share that with you all, I hope the words can translate you your own life, as much as they do to mine.

Long live the Reggae King!!! ....ishax

It seems that recently I've been able to occupy my time with only one thing:
Reading the gorgeous, and controversial Penguin Classic 'Lolita' by Vladimir Nabokov. It's pretty much a twisted book that unveils the "daring story of obsessive love and transgression by Mr Humbert Humbert's (or H.H. for short) lust towards his pubescent step-daughter ".
Weird? I know. Disgusting, you say? Well, not quite. Although the story itself is highly controversial, the lyrical writings by Nabokov (Who I seem to often refer to as 'Mr. Russia'), are so moving that I can't help but love the novels construction!! God, I sound like my high school Lit teacher!!
Anyway, Just cause I love it!-Here's an exert from the first vignette of Parte` One:

Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins.

My sin, my soul. Lo-lee-ta:

the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap,

at three, on the teeth. Lo. Lee. Ta.
She was Lo, plain Lo, in the morning,

standing four feet ten in one sock.

She was Lola in slacks. She was Dolly at school.

She was Dolores on the dotted line.

But in my arms she was always Lolita.

-Vladimir Nabokov.

Hauntingly creepy isn't it...??
I've heard that the movie based on 'Lolita' is quite a decent watch, so I'm hoping I can get my hands on it soon!... well either the 1962 original version or the re-make that emerged in 1997. From what I've Googled (TGFTGOG -thank God for the gift of google!) the 1997 movie is the way to go. The music scores by Ennio Morricone, which I just happened to get a hold of are both pensive yet captivating so even though I haven't actually seen this movie, it's taking high priority on my 'Must Watch' list.

On a more 'material' level, 'Lolita' played by Dominique Swain looks amazing in most of the screen shots; her outfits reflecting the subtle sweetness and sexuality that was an emerging society. All to often they are unusual and a bit chaotic (pattern-wise) and I really thing this captures the turbulence of the H.H.'s feelings towards 'Lolita', so I give great props to the movies stylist!!!

Dominique really does look amazing in all these screen shots... I've decided I really want to make some outfits similar to the ones above because they're Gorgeous!!!

Best get cracking.... ishax

Slightly rounded.

This weekend has been shocking for me;
First I missed the Pigeonhole launch on Friday night.
Was then given evils by a Bunch of people lurking around Northbridge on Saturday, and on this glorious day of rest... I missed the Vintage Sale in North Perth!!

Bad things, Bad things, Bad things, Bad things, Bad things, Bad things, Bad things, Bad things, Bad things!!!! (and not even the kinky kind of Bad things!)

I feel like screaming my frustrations into a pillow... But I'm currently washing the Pillow slips... Damn you Hygiene!

To top it all off,
Today I felt like Moon-face.

You know??? The guy with the moon? For a face?...
In that story written by Enid Blyton called the Faraway Tree, or something or other.
(err... or maybe it was the Wishing Chair?) Ah, not to worry.
I was never a fan of racist books anyhow.

I've become so bored that I've resorted to watching the 'Sex Education' showon my laptop....

Mum just walked past my room.

Herpes.

Awkward.... Birds and the bees talk anyone?

Don't have sex.

Or you will get Chlamydia;

and die... ishax

Spoon my addiction, two sugars, and stir.

It's day: blah blah blah, of the holidays.

I find myself becoming a junkie. - sweet nectar, it's too good.
But sleep has become a thing of the past.

Habits are hard to kick.
Maybe its a good thing I'm not Pete Doherty....♥
Nah, he's too amazing to not envy.

If coffee's so bad for you,

....does that make tea a drug too?

drinkers remorse?...ishax

I may hate birds... but 'Birdy & Me' is a whole other story.

Lately I've been lax on my hunt for unusual things. However it seems that this mundane approach to holiday-living has finally kicked me in the pants. Every morning at about 2am, I've found myself flicking through a vast number of magz; a habit which I swear I've genetically inherited from my mum, a woman whose sleep patterns are about as regular as the menstruation cycle of a 12 year old (this I fear has become a side effect of yet another family trait: having more than 2 spoonfuls of eco-friendly coffee right before bed). Never the less, I began to notice a pattern in the artwork used for a lot of the femme`-magazine articles:
They contained captivating, life-like pictures of beautiful women, however each was off-beat in some fashion; often nature-themed. For instance protruding the head of one alluring figure, were two tree-branches, one on which sat a blue-bird. On another occasion, the lower half of a 'young' Courtney love-esqu image de-materialised into an array of warm autumn leaves.

These pieces are the creations of Kelly Smith, an incredible artist and fashion-forward individual who conjures up works such as these, both from her own inspiring imagination and from photographs taken by other noted fashion-faces. I really am loving her works and suggest you give Kellys blog more time than a mere glance 'once over', not only for the chance to view more of her art pieces but to check out some of the write-ups and opinions she has on up-to-date trends, designer labels and celebrities.

Love where your work is heading Kelly!....ishax

Fancy a taste of high-pitched 'peach, plum, pear' anyone???

So today whilst relaxing in and about my room, I was suddenly startled by what I initially assumed to be the sound of a screeching bag of cats coming from my sisters room. While the noise continued I thought to myself: "Siajan! Why on Earth have you kidnapped a clowder of cats?!!!...Not only that, but seriously tormented cats?!?!"

Confused, I stormed into her room intent on silencing the high-pitched noise or to, at the very least, satisfy my own curiosities. As I threw open my sisters bedroom door, there I found Siajan, happily typing away at her laptop, i-tunes open as she sang.

In that short moment, as I listened more closely I realised the noise was not cats, nor was it asylum patients... but the voice of one whose high-pitched tone could put the Bee Gees to shame... "Siajan, who the hell is this???" I asked.

Joanna Newsom.

You are insane!!!... and yet, with a voice more unusual than any I have ever heard, and the rhythmic 'harp-melodies' that remind you of an enthusiastic toddler beating away at his new xylophone (no seriously that is a complement... I can't think of anything that reflects her music better, than such an innocent and enjoyable moment), I'm proud to say that Joanna, you have climbed your way to the top of my ipod 'favourites playlist'.

Although some may liken her voice to that of : "A singing chipmunk whose nipples are being twisted by pliers" (Thank you Youtube user for that description...), personally I feel it to be somewhat of a 'Soko'-esqu approach to music: Unusual, innocent and utterly captivating!

My favourite of her songs would deffinitely have to be Peach, Plum, Pear. The lyrics are both simple and beautiful, throughout the song, her voice almost grows on you.

Peach, Plum, Pear.

We speak in the store
I'm a sensitive bore
you seem markedly more
and I'm oozing surprise.

But it's late in the day
and you're well on your way
what was golden went gray
and I'm suddenly shy.

And the gathering floozies
afford to be choosy
and all sneezing darkly
in the dimming divide.

I have read the right books
to interpret your looks
you were knocking me down
with the palm of your eye.

Go Na na na na na na na na na na
na na na na na na na na na na
na na na na na na na na

This was unlike the story
it was written to be
I was riding its back
when it used to ride me.

And we were galloping manic
to the mouth of the source
we were swallowing panic
in the face of its force.

And I am blue, I am blue, and unwell,
made me bolt like a horse.

ooh, Na na na na na na na na na na
na na na na na na na na na na
na na na na na na na na

Now it's done.
Watch it go.
You've changed some.
Water run from the snow.

Am I so dear?
Do I run rare?
And you've changed some:
peach, plum, pear.

Joanna has to be one of the only people aside from Lady Ga-ga who is able to completely get away with speaking nonsense for pretty much two entirebridges throughout her song. Like seriously;

"Go Na na na na na na na na na na
na na na na na na na na na na
na na na na na na na na "

..... Completely pointless right??? and yet her off-putting voice locks you in to the song; just hankering and begging for more. (sorta like someone with a fetish for being punnished eh?) Regardless, it's bloody amazing if you ask me!!
So before I leave and end my rave about little Miss Joanna, Here is her the video to this remarkable off-beat song. Give it a chance and I swear it'll grow on you ;)

So, in the words of the woman herself: Peach, Pear, Plum.... ishax

Side Note

In a bit of a side note....

When did we start substituting comfort for sex appeal???
I've only recently noticed that despite the efforts of many girls, (that even includes some of my piers), to appear relaxed and emphasise their 'natural beauty' and individuality, when faced with a social event such as a party of gathering etc. we still tend to go above and beyond to re-shape ourselves into the glamorised Hollywood 'plastic fantastic' mould. I myself am guilty of this, and only really started thinking about it because I'm set to go to a friends event tomorrow night.

So as I already mentioned, I have a party to go to tomorrow night, and as per usual, I want to go wearing something that will make everyone; stop for a moment, look me over and say: "Damn! She has style!"

However this poses a problem for me.... What kind of style is this???

I've noticed that in the past, whenever I go to a party I tend to pull on the tight-fitting mini dress, flip on heels that circus performers would well and truly deem 'stilt-worthy' and layer on the makeup, cause in all honesty, it's been drilled into me that this is what everyone expects. A sexed up version of myself... The problem is- It's not me! It's fake.

So on a night like tomorrow, when it's supposed to be freezing outside with some of the worst weather conditions Perth has seen since that freak Hale storm earlier this year, am I really willing to under-go my usual routine all for the sake of some notion I've built up in my head??
Just because... "It's expected of me???"

I don't want to sound preachy, but girls nowadays (including myself) have been raised with an obscured notion of what is really means to be 'sexy'. I mean, fair enough if dressing up makes you feel good, then GO FOR IT! But, if like me, all this prep-work makes you consider doing something that is harmful to your body (like wearing next-to-nothing in minus 2 degrees weather) then there is a problem!!

We have begun to trade off what is relaxed and natural, with raunchy images of so called 'perfection', that are passed down via various media outlets!! It's my wish for girls to stop being so critical of themselves. Even though I may in turn, at times, be a hypocrite in saying so, it is my desire to be accepted the way I am and I think the more people that try to open themselves up to what is real and beautiful, the more tolerant society will become and the stronger the bond of female solidarity. ( didn't mean to go all feminist on you guy... woooops!! ;) )

Relaxed

VS.

Raunchy

Just something to think about....ishax

Karaoke Tonight.

Okay so tonight I had planned to venture to a karaoke night in Northbridge, with some of the friends I had visited Japan with last year. Sounds like a good night you say??? Well sadly the night didn't pan out as expected. What i mean to say is...a fair few things went pear-shaped! For starters what seemed like a decent group of friends (about 12/13 people) eventually dwindled down to 5 as the hours drew closer to K-time (Karaoke Time). Now personally I didn't mind this, I mean the people who eventually showed up are awesome so it wasn't a big deal, however the events to follow were less than enthusing.

Anyway, the gang and I found ourselves at this quaint Chinese restaurant where we ordered various types of chicken, pork and duck dishes along with greens and rice, DELICIOUS NO?? well... not for me. You see, earlier this week I happened to have an appointment with my orthodontist, who to the best of my knowledge was meant to have a look-see at how my artificially straightened teeth were progressing and then let me go on my merry way, as was our usual ritual. However, it seemed that this week he decided to spice it up, by making the judgement that they were not straight enough for his liking. Consequently I now must wear a RETAINER for 3 weeks, NON-STOP... yes, a disgusting, food-collecting, painful retainer that has forced my teeth so far back into my mouth that I can no-longer eat anything that isn't pulverised into mash-form or blended into soup.... At least, that's what I found out tonight while trying to eat a mouth-watering piece of crispy duck.
This is how it went down:
-I screamed
-a young child in shock dropped his (obviously brand new) Ipad
-the waiter coming over to clear my plate lost his concentration and lets just say that chopsticks ended up rolling on the floor....
Yeap. It was a complete kerfuffle.

So eventually the comical dinner ended and whilst leaving the restaurant we decided that karaoke was no longer the go due to our teeny tiny group size. So instead made our way through Piccadilly Arcade to watch the new Adam Sandler movie...

-It wasn't on.

Eventually we decided to run in to the Toy Story 3 movie despite it starting 15mins earlier believing that there would've only been credits running.

-There were none, so we missed the start of the movie.

All in all it was actually a pretty good film. I really enjoyed the Ken doll character. I can't remember who voices him, but I know it's some guy who has a chronic drug addiction/ depression... I'm sure I read it somewhere in a magazine. Maybe the thing I liked most about him was his love of clothes. I literally jumped out of my seat when (and I don't want to give too much away) he was modelling his little heart out for Barbie. Here's just a taste of this 'groovy' character ...

Enough of Ken's cute antics, I thought I'd show you all the outfit I dragged up for my night of 'karaoke-fun' minus the karaoke!!!... with half the amount of 'fun'... but a large dose of comical irony :S

Yeah, I threw in the hair extensions for added effect. Although you can totally tell my real hair apart from it because my real hair is both naturally curly and has orangey tips- Ah, the perils of re-growth!!!! Gotta love the necklace I have though, I'm amazed I found something like it at a Diva store, although granted I did pull bits off of it and glue other things to it. In general the shape and craftsmanship is quite good compared to some of the things that surface from that place. My beloved hat is from Dangerfield - I swear it never comes off my head now and I'm developing a Bald spot on the center part where it sits on my head... not good, not good!!.... Admittedly, I still adore it though!! The glasses I'm wearing, which are a key part of my outfit (because they're so damn cute, round and unusual- unlike those 'faddy' ray-bans) are from Ice Accessories... Shocking isn't it?!! However they are over 3 years old so most stores won't stock them anymore :(

Luckily I bought about 5 pairs!!!

I've basically used all these accessories to complement my extremely simple grey lace dress and suede button-down blouse that I got from the Good Sammy's in Osbourne Park. Honestly that place is amazing for really wear-able finds that are still unusual enough to capture peoples attention! I call things like that 'Double-take' pieces.

Oh my! it's getting late, but I don't mind.

However it seems my sister does... She's telling me to stop typing so loudly and go to sleep.

Best keep the family life peaceful, I suppose.

Until we meet again...ishax

"The Moon Robots are Comming Jonno....!!!"

Prepare Yourselves,

I have just decided I would like to live in space.

... but it may be cold

....and lonely

....Maybe I'll pass???

Thoughfully Yours...ishax

Jungle Monkeys Love To Dance, but it's too cold to wear hot-pants!!!

A few days ago I saw myself yet again visiting a quint little Vinnies store around the Woodlands area. Seems my funds have been tight this month so I've had to curb the spending a little lately. (Although, if I do end up with a job by the end of next week it seems I may have solved my money woes. Fingers Crossed xx.) So once again I was having a little looksy with my younger sister; the taller, more tan and attractive version of myself and pulled out a fair few very decent items.

Op-shop and Thrift-store Browsing...

On a brief note....

Perth-ians, Perth-ians.... is it just me, or does everybody look like they're geared up for Summer??!?!?! Now don't get me wrong, I love wearing skirts and shorts just as much as the next person, but not at the risk of my health!
Nothing's more off-putting than seeing someone whose style is absolutely flawless, but who at the same time is coughing and spluttering their face off....Really, when it all boils down to it, your outfit depends on how YOU wear it.

I bet Gisele Bundchen or Heather Marks (despite being practically flawless) wouldn't have become as idolised as they are today if they weren't able to take a seemingly drab outfits and wear them as if they had been fashioned out of pure gold, because believe me, designers don't always send the most appealing outfits out onto runways!

For Example; Jeremy Scott... I love you to death but the 'food fight' collection took strange, un-wearable outfits to all new levels:

Like seriously??? A Pizza?? Donuts?? Burger and fries?? Even a Snickers Bar??!!... Most models would be scared to eat that stuff, let alone parade around in it!!

(Ooooh. Apologies for that horrible over-generalising of models!)

Then again; when I think about it... a large part of the fashion wold is devoted to un-wearable outfit fantasies and the surreal; AKA 'Haute Couture'....

Regardless I'm pretty sure anything a legitimate designer from Paris or Milan etc. can create would deffinitely be a THOUSAND times better than something I could sew up. I recently started sewing a pin-up style, patterned body suit, however it seems that I over-estimated the voluptuous-ness of my 'Breasticles' and the whole thing came out like a sack on top :S

"Breasticles"... haha, strange word now that I think about it; I wonder who the heck made that word up.... WOAH! ....and why are there so many myspace pages dedicated to it???

Ah well, I guess myspace is pretty much irrelevant for anything besides listening to music theses days so it probably doesn't matter ;)

Lastly, Just a quick snap of what I wore on this particular day... as you can see my comfort blanket (The mini bowler hat and rather large oval glasses) is with me at all times, no matter what I'm wearing. Jeezzzz, I desperately need to find a new beloved item of clothing to replace them!!! :S

Well so-long everyone!

I won't keep you... ishax.