I'm obsessed with this website at present: Texts from last night; a collection of seriously hilarious drunken, inebriated, insulting, hysterically funny texts.
TEXT 1: I took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...I went into my mom's room to say goodnight and I don't remember anything...she said that I got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then I started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and I go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and I said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then I capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
TEXT 2: So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
TEXT 3: At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP!"
Seriously these are the most hilarious, boredom consuming snipits of peoples lives all complied into one super awesome website and I highly recommend you check them out. -Especially the 'Best of all time" category (which you may or may not have to use google to find as sometimes the link on the site likes to screw around with web-users). Regardless over this loooooooong summer Im comforted by the fact that there will always be some texts from last night, that will push me through the tough times of boredom and indifference.
I swear I've laughed in a space of ever 5 minutes throughout the entire first season! If you've never taken the time to watch it, the show's basically about three families, who are all completely different but still intertwined with one another. It is truly HILARIOUS and I give props to the increadibly talented writers who've come up with really controvertial but very honest events that unfold at every stage of family life, regardless of its construction. This has to be one of my favourite scenes and is now a T-shirt print that I covert. If you don't watch the show, this is from Season 1, Episode 7 and involves a chubby hispanic child (Manny) in his pursuit of fencing glory.
All I can say is, Thank God my family life isn't televised...ishax
Okay so here's catchup part two- What I've been doing since watching Harry Potter until the present time!Well yesterday I had issuses with everyone's favourite joke of a transportation company, Transperth. So here's how it started:
I was supposed to meet my friend Katie in the city in order to (as most girls do) begin our day of rather epic Perth-wide shopping and finally, finnish off with a hardworking gym session. So I got my goods together and moved my arse to the bus-stop. -It was actually henious trying to move my sleep depreived, sun-rejecting, hermit-like body out into the open. . . mainly because I've stopped sleeping as of late and have been running on multiple coffees in unusual forms.- Yeap that's right, hot coffee, iced coffee and yeah, I even made a coffee popsicle, which actually tasted bloody good!
Never the less, I waited, and waited and feaking waited! However this bus never came. So finally after about three-quarters of an hour I get on, and finally make it to the train station. And lucky me!- The train had just left and I was forced to wait 15 minutes for the next one. Then when the next one came.... the doors closed on me. Well actually they literally closed on this old Italian woman which in and of its self was horrible but really? I was already and HOUR late!!
So eventually Katie came to me, and we spent the day checking out Joondalup shopping centre. Yeah, most people would turn their noses down at this but Joondalup is actually MASSIVE and stocks some really awesome things - I bought Socks! (God, I'm cool....)
Anyway after leaving the shopping centre, we decided to swap our gym date (being the slackers we are) and go to IKEA to find things to make our rooms at college hip and chic. Actually I just wanna do something to it that'll distract me from the fact that it's ABSOLUTELY TINY!
So we played around in the store and even had some IKEA caffeteria cake which deffinitely undermined the previous plans of a gym session.- woops! Katie managed to find some awesome fairy lights to throw up in her room, and I totally think she's gunna make it look awesome!
I myself, remain undecided on what the hell I'm going to do with my room, but I'm sure something will inspire me eventually.
After all this, being super tired and having a doctors appointment later we left and I came back home to watch more pre-pubescent tween queens (Toddlers and Tiaras) and middle-ages he/she queens (Rupaul's Drag Race). . .I'm so lazy! Oh well, today I'm catching up on excercise so after I dye my hair blonde at 11 today I plan on meeting Katie at U-DUB for some Gym re-education!
Despite the clear objections from almost everyone around me, I'm fascinated by Tattoos and if I could, would cover myself in their amaing artistic glory!
(...and I've gotta say, no women show them off as proudly as my idols; The Suicide Girls).
Sadly I doubt I will ever commit to a full sleeve or chest piece as I so desire, due mainly to the fact that it is still widely taboo across the world. This is kind of depressing really, although it doesn't mean I can't still live in hope!
I'm sorry I've taken more than a million years to get my act together and re-blog, but what with ending exams, celebratory moments and moving back home it seems that vegging out and re-zombifying myself has taken preference over writing whatI'd describe in the last few weeks as highly questionable/ emotionally unstable rants... (Seriously; I'm now 70% determined to withold my insanity from public display!... I think.)
Anyhow, now that my first year of YOU-KNEE-VERSE-CITY is finito (and doesn't that summise perfectly how much I've grown and matured over the year...) I can focus on blogging about the truly random and often seemingly pointless shennanigans I get up to.
So firstly, I should probably re-count my viewing of the ONE AND ONLY HARRY POTTER and the Deathly Hallows ...well actually it's more like the ONE out of two when you think about it. Especially considering I really only saw half a movie. -Wait. So if I left halfway through part one, that'd mean I would've only seen a quarter of the film! Oh crap. You must be reading this thinking: "Ermnnn..... right???..... God you must be truly bored to consider that something worthy of my noting."
But seriously.... YES; I am. and YES; it is.
Anyhow immediately post my final exam I made the epic 8 minute and 37 second journey to the city to meet my wonderful friend Eris who had just suffered through the exact same period of wait and angst due to the fact that we both study the language of 'Hello Kitty'. By the way, I'm talking about Japanese, cause it seems the last person I said that to turned around and asked me how fluent I was in 'pusseh' :\ (Needless to say that was the most lengthy and awkward bus ride of my life.)
Back on track. We met up; went to Jaws; roamed and roamed and roamed in order to kill 3 hours... and bought some Asian foods (are you noticing a theme in my day already) until finally it was time and we found ourselves seated beneath an effigy of what I believe to be a satanic orgy/ broadway nudist musical. Honestly, next time you go to Piccadilly Cinemas; Theater numero uno, check out the carved images of nudists having sex, dancing and merry-making atop a skinned individual. Yeaaaaahhh....that shit was created in the 20's so this can only mean one thing: Our grandparents were complete weirdos!!!!
So my overall impression of the movie:
Yeap, it was somewhat like that. Although at times scenes were a bit too melodramatic, I really liked the movie and [ *spoiler* ] it even managed to get a FUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKK out of me, when that creepy old woman turned into the even creepier snake thing. Yeah I jumped spilling melted rasberry icecream on my skirt and spent the rest of the afternoon walking like a loony in fear that the resulting reddish stain below wouldn't be viewed by onlookeds as the calling card of that mysterious ninja: 'Aunt Red'.
Anyhow considering it's late and I have planned a gym session, that's all I'll fill you in with for today. Hopefully I'll be able to get up to the present in the next few days. Ohhhhh that'd make me from the future then. Sweeeeeet. (^-^ )
Goodnight and Goodluck. God I hated that movie...ishax
As mother always said, cut your losses early then high tail it like a bat outta hell...whilst avoiding trees, cows and sharp corners on open country roads.
A few days ago one of my friends asked me something rather strange:
"You're a vegan right? So then, do you have Vegan Powers??"
At first the general WTF expression that I usually make, when someone asks me something borderline ludicrous (or when I see that guy who wears giant sunglasses, sequined clothes and dances in the city on frequent occasions) made an appearance. However, later that night he sent me a link to a clip from the movie Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World.
In all honesty this movie is an incredible film, not in the sense that it was good; but more or less that you sit there for give or take 2ish hours waiting for some part of it to start making sense- and it never does! I must say though, that I thoroughly enjoyed checking out the incredibly alternative hair colours that made their way onto screen. Will half a head of 'Hyper Blue' hair be making it's way into my personally style anytime soon?.... I'll get back to you on that one. :S
Back on track, this video features good old Scott taking on Boyfriend numero tre`(-no), Mr Todd Ingram, in a battle to the ...err... death? However Boyfriend number 3 is no push-over, due primarily to his acquisition of VEGAN POWERS! I'm assuming that the whole idea behind 'vegan powers' is that due to restricting ones diet from meat and animal products, one is forced to eat the best of fruits, vegetables and other health foods in order to survive, and as a result of this they are not only supreme survivers, have the gusto from premium foods, but also a sense of extreme pretentiousness- Which can totally bolster an individual during a battle to the death.
Since I watched this little cracker of a vid, I've begun to wonder whether I've gained any incredible skills... and YES, yes I have.
My first vegan skill-The ability to fall asleep very easily.
Yes indeed it's a valuable skill, especially during the exam period that has been plaguing me for the past two and a bit weeks. After many many weeks of sleepless night instead of having to re-set my sleeping patters, this no longer matters, as I can fall asleep anytime and anywhere.
It's also fantastic for uses such as avoiding church appearances and/or showing my disapproval of many boring situations.
My second vegan skill -Insatiable Hunger.
I can't stop eating~ It's fairly scary! As a trade-off, in order to prevent the occurrence of my first ability (one of which I still haven't got the hang of controlling, cause yeah, I'm totally ).... I eat.
So anything you throw at me, will be consumed like a black-hole! XD Oh wait, unless it's non-vegan food. -Ah shit, I just realised how truly useless this skill is. *sigh*~
My third (and most powerful) vegan skill -Extreme pretentiousness.
Yeah, most vegans I'd assume would have this skill because well, most vegans ARE pretentious. I'm not gunna lie, it takes an incredible amount of will power to crack the uppedy shell that acts as the vegans 'force field'.
Ah, but why am I explaining all of this to you? Just have a look at the youtube vid and see for yourself!
Okay, so he died and vegan powers were proved useless in comparison to the ultimate 'cool' that is Scott Pilgrim and his Guitarist flare....and what has this taught me??!!
VEGAN POWERS + GUITAR FLAIR = WORLD DOMINATION!....ishax
Evening All, It seems that due to the boredom I've faced as a result of exams I've become rather mental. However cutting my hair seems to have remedied this by making me feel like someone new. This really got me thinking how susceptible people are to change.
The whole concept that a small change can have a multiplied effect on everything around it, is something I find immensely interesting. Ah yes, the 'multiplier'. I probably only mentioned that word due to the fact that I've been bombarded with economics lectures today (18 hours worth to be exact!) so I apologise for any weird terms that may re-surface in the next few minutes, hours, days, weeks, etc. But yes, change is a mysterious thing, when I have time I think I'll create some kind of 'CHANGE' flow chart. It'd be fun to see all the way's this has come about in my own life. Actually that's rather nerdy.... probably shouldn't have mentioned it eh? :S
Oh well,
THAT WAS IT!!!! I remember what I really wanted to do in this post! -To show you one of my most admired people doing what can only be described as dominating the Yale University Lecture theater by presenting one of the most AMAZING thesis' and discussion topics I've ever seen. Africa an the Curse of Foreign Aid: Andrew M. Mwenda. (Also just gunna throw out the issue of starving kids in Africa to Anonymous who had such wonderful and insightful thoughts upon it. - HAH!...Watch the video my love, then speak with a more informed opinion... and do remember it's not a racist critique as Mr Mwenda is himself of African decent and origin.)
Now do you see why, I've watched this 8 times in the last 2 days...ishax
I need to get some things off my chest. Not all of them are good, so if you're prone to overreacting or general shit, then I highly recommend bypassing this post.
You have been warned!
Okay let's begin...
1. I DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP. Seriously, I don't give a crap about what you two do together, or the way they/ their family/ anyone else treats you because of it. Really, a relationship is a thing between two people and it should stay that way. Stop bringing it up in conversation because really, I find it possibly the most boring topic to talk about in the history of boring things- and that's saying something cause I studied Lit and was constantly forced to talk about boring shizen!
2. TO A MALE INDIVIDUAL. Stay out of the friendship. Oh my god, it's like a never-ending bombardment of 'not-neededness'. What the hell gives you the right to say anything about myself when you have hardly ever taken the time to get to know me. Despite me actually making an effort to know you and in all honesty, I can say I'm not a fan in the least of your friends.
3. WHY IS EVERY CONVERSATION SO PATHETIC. Do I have to join the debating/ politics clubs in order to talk to people who actually have something decent to say???? Urgh! Why are so many peoples heads filled with pointless crap all the time? It's gotten to the point where I just don't want to talk to them... and actually haven't been. Although it may seem harsh, unless you have something worth me putting an input into, then I really can't see the point in me sitting there, smiling and pretending that all the 'bleh' you're spouting interests me in the slightest.
4. I WANT MY STUFF BACK. To all the people that have my things, seriously I would like them returned. It's just plain rude to keep peoples belongings for OVER A MONTH! - TWO EVEN! - ACTUALLY MORE LIKE 6! Also to the people who've actually STOLEN my things, and yes I know a few of you... Seriously, that's jsut plain low. Have some common decency next time and maybe think how you would feel if it was you.
5. I SHOULD STOP SEEING YOU. I really should. This is going nowhere and although that makes me kind of sad . I know it's the best thing to do before I let all of this go too far. So why am I still holding on, hoping you'll change?
6. DON'T YOU DARE EVER END A CONVERSATION WITH "WE NEED TO CHAT BECAUSE I'M UNHAPPY WITH YOU". How bloody rude do you have to be? Especially then telling me I've been rude to you by 'cutting you off in convos' etc. Honestly, a convo?? You do it all the time (but I suppose people always overlook their own faults)! Sometimes I think there is way to much drama here. It's like you feed off of it. People aren't happy and cheery all the time (as this post clearly highlights)- I can't be happy and cheery and bubbly, and always smiling whilst saying: "yeah lets hang out" yadda yah.... so if I'm in a bad mood, which is highly plausable considering it's exam time, then isn't it a good thing that I'm showing you how I feel rather than being fake all the time?!!?! So yeah, if this is what you wished for then great; I am most deffinitely pissed at you now, and I highly doubt that's going to change until after exams.
Others I think my head's the only good part about me.
And then I have those days, where everything looks like shit and I sit in a corner eating my box of vegan cookies, whilst cursing my parents for their DNA.
I just checked Student Connect and it seems STATS is on Saturday. Oh Christ I desperately want to pass. Better get a wriggle on with my study then. Although I can't say it helps a whole lot when WebCT keeps freezing on me.I hate you University...
