To my blessed sister, by whom I was given the (mild) joy of being dragged back to the NIGHTMARE that was my ex-high schools 'Presentation Night' in order to witness her recipients of an award, I say.....
Than(fuc)k You.
Congratulations on winning the Drama Award!
May it forever bring you happiness and bliss, so that in the future, when we're both old and grey, our grand kids (or random neighbour hood children who we will entice into our floral infested homes-WHICH, might I add, in my vision are situated right beside one another) will know you as the cooler old person.
Oh yes, in our stories of the glory days; you will have won the Drama award and I, only gay boring things like: most consistent effort (sounds like equivalent of an 'I swam in a race' ribbon), or Award for AIT (Computer Crap), or Runner-up Dux. Jesus my life is filled with half-arsed accomplishments.
Just you wait sister. One of these days I shall be the cooler sibling- (and then will finally be able to like that facebook group to affirm it!)
May it forever bring you happiness and bliss, so that in the future, when we're both old and grey, our grand kids (or random neighbour hood children who we will entice into our floral infested homes-WHICH, might I add, in my vision are situated right beside one another) will know you as the cooler old person.
Oh yes, in our stories of the glory days; you will have won the Drama award and I, only gay boring things like: most consistent effort (sounds like equivalent of an 'I swam in a race' ribbon), or Award for AIT (Computer Crap), or Runner-up Dux. Jesus my life is filled with half-arsed accomplishments.
Just you wait sister. One of these days I shall be the cooler sibling- (and then will finally be able to like that facebook group to affirm it!)
No, but really. Good Job sibling.
You've done me proud!
And I can totally just claim the fact that you're cool cause I raised you and taught you everything you know.....
Genius!...ishax
Genius!...ishax
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ReplyDeleteDear Billy,
ReplyDeleteGo fuck a grapefruit.
And do you know why I choose a grapefruit over a lemon???
1.
It's twice the size of a lemon (and don't be fooled- size counts!)
2.
Because of it's size, a grapefruit is filled twice as much with bitter juice...
Much like the feelings I hold towards your pointless comment at present.